Extreme pooing
Sep. 7th, 2015 12:20 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ladyofastolatThis morning, there was a dollop of poo inside an empty milk bottle I put out last night. Inside the milk bottle! There was a small smear inside the rim, but the bulk of it was neatly deposited in the bottom, implying skill and accuracy in the aiming. There is no spillage or smearing on the outside of the bottle, or on the ground around it. The two adjacent milk bottles were undisturbed, implying skill and finesse when it comes to balancing the bottom over the target without jostling any of the surroundings.
I am not wise in the ways of poo, so cannot express an opinion on who the guilty party might be, but it's a fairly sizeable dollop, suggesting something with a an internal storage capacity more like that of a cat than that of a vole. One would imagine that the height of the bottom above the ground is equal or greater to the height of a milk bottle, unless it's someone small enough to slither up the side of a bottle, or the possessor of a trampoline.
Our front doorstep is a dead end, and is sheltered by a large bush, so it's not likely to attract passing trade. Some animal has made a special trip to our doorstep and has gone to considerable effort to supply us with a neat bottled sample. Did it mistake us for a vet? Has it recently been given a lecture on the evils of fouling pavements? Why else would it carefully deposit said dollop inside a milk bottle, despite the challenges involved?
I am not wise in the ways of poo, so cannot express an opinion on who the guilty party might be, but it's a fairly sizeable dollop, suggesting something with a an internal storage capacity more like that of a cat than that of a vole. One would imagine that the height of the bottom above the ground is equal or greater to the height of a milk bottle, unless it's someone small enough to slither up the side of a bottle, or the possessor of a trampoline.
Our front doorstep is a dead end, and is sheltered by a large bush, so it's not likely to attract passing trade. Some animal has made a special trip to our doorstep and has gone to considerable effort to supply us with a neat bottled sample. Did it mistake us for a vet? Has it recently been given a lecture on the evils of fouling pavements? Why else would it carefully deposit said dollop inside a milk bottle, despite the challenges involved?
