A mysterious gift

Dear Benevolent Alcohol Spirit,

I came home from work today to find that you had mysteriously deposited two very large barrels of beer in our front garden. I did not know that you existed before I saw your works today, but I imagine that you are a grown-up version of Santa Claus, bringing alcohol to the houses of good girls and boys while they are out. Rest assured that I will perform all the correct libations, donations and exulatations to you (while also humbly requesting that next time you also leave some big handsome strong men to help me carry the large barrels out of the front garden, where they might perhaps prove a temptation to local thieving gangs/cats/dogs/rabbits/toddlers. The barrels, that is, not the men.)

I am about to turn my back for a while. I like fruit wine and country cider very much.

Yours,

Me