Red arrows

Jun. 9th, 2007 05:29 pm
ladyofastolat: (Order of the Stick)
[personal profile] ladyofastolat
We've just had a lovely aerobatics display by the Red Arrows just over our house. This is faintly worrying, since if they're aiming for the Festival, they're 4 miles off, and if they're aiming for Cowes Week, they're 2 months too early. As I said to Pellinor, "I would have thought that the RAF's crack fighter unit could read a map." He scoffed mightily about the "crack fighter unit", and said something technical about the sort of planes they use. However, I stand by my statement. My theory is that aerobatics serve to baffle and confuse the enemy, and lull them into a false sense of security. I'm sure that the army also has a crack team of ballet dancers, whose role is to pirouette prettily up to the open-mouthed enemy, then produce a knife from their pretty pink tutus and kill the disarmed enemy. Well, I think it would work.

Many of you have already heard my Battleship Theory, but for those who haven't, here it is. My theory is that all battleships should be called things like "Cute Bunny" and "Fairy Twinkletoes." This wil have several benefits:

1. The people serving on that ship will be so embarrassed to have to go round with "Cute Bunny" written on their uniforms, that they will become super fierce and macho, to compensate.

2. If the enemy dares do a single hostile action against you, all the papers in the world will have to report that "Dastardly Killer fires upon Cute Bunny." You have won the propaganda war instantly. Your own people rally to support the poor defenceless cute bunnies, and also all the neutral countries in the world think your enemy is awful for sinking the cute bunny. However, if the cute bunny manages to score a hit on the Dastardly Killer, the enemy becomes the laughing stock of the world for being mauled by a bunny.

Oh. There has just been a sudden very loud roar, and one solitary red arrow has raced away towards the Solent. I think he must have killed his friends, and is trying to get away discreetly. Which is kind of hard when you're in a bright red aeroplane.
This account has disabled anonymous posting.
If you don't have an account you can create one now.
HTML doesn't work in the subject.
More info about formatting

Profile

ladyofastolat: (Default)
ladyofastolat

July 2024

S M T W T F S
 123456
789 10111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
28293031   

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Jun. 23rd, 2025 11:45 pm
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios